by Steve Hayes | Jun 29, 2021 | Emotion, Happiness, Relationships
A good man died a few days ago at the age of 87. He was one of the single most important persons in my life, and indeed he’s why I am a psychologist. I never met him. I corresponded with him only once – when I sent him a thank you note nearly 50 years after he’d...
by Steve Hayes | Jun 16, 2021 | Acceptance, Anxiety, Depression, Emotion
In his classic book “Man’s Search for Meaning” Victor Frankl tells the story of a client of his who was terrorized by a constant fear of sweating. Whenever he expected to perspire, he would become anxious, leading him to sweat profusely, which would thus confirm his...
by Steve Hayes | Apr 12, 2021 | Acceptance, Anxiety, Emotion, Happiness, Health
Imagine you are sitting in a car, and you are driving down a lonely highway. Suddenly, in the middle of nowhere, a warning light goes off. Your oil pressure is very low. If you just ignore it and continue your drive, you run the risk of doing serious damage to your...
by Steve Hayes | Mar 10, 2021 | Emotion, Relationships
When people talk about love, they often mean the intense kind of involuntary emotional states you “fall” into that go by that name. It’s a model of love you see in Disney movies, hear about in pop songs, and read about in corny romance novels. It’s the kind that...
by Steve Hayes | Feb 11, 2015 | Acceptance, Acceptance and Commitment Therapy, ACT, Depression, Emotion, Evidence-Based Psychotherapy, Happiness, Human Suffering, Mindfulness, psychological flexibility, Values
Just because you’re not sick, doesn’t mean you’re healthy. We are used to that idea in physical health. Being cancer free is not the same as being fit—you have to take the steps needed to develop your physical strength, endurance, and flexibility. Not having the flu...
by Steve Hayes | Oct 29, 2014 | Acceptance and Commitment Therapy, ACT, Avoidance, Cognitive Defusion, Denial, Emotion, Evidence-Based Psychotherapy, Guilt, Present Moment, Relationships, Values
Why Our National Conversation is Wrong and What to Do about It In the wake of the NFL domestic violence scandal the media has exploded with questions about what we need to do governmentally, institutionally, and politically to better manage partner abuse. Some have...